Scratch: What’s On Your List? (1)

A couple of months ago, when I was completely drenched in thoughts of what to do with my life, I had this conversation with my best buddy and at some point, we found ourselves totally unsure of what to do in the future, of what kind of life we want to live. So what happened was, we agreed on doing a list of the things we want to achieve before we die. Later on, I thought it would be better if we change the “want” to “should” –this could make the whole experience of completing the list a lot more fulfilling.

I started my list, and here’s a few of what’s in there…

Things I SHOULD do before I die

-Dye my hair red, and then blue

-Get totally drunk the night before an exam, and still get a high score in the exam! LOL. (I think I’ve done this, but not that totally drunk… So I should still try this.)

-Append a professional title to my name. Could it be Atty.?

-See the New York skyline

-Explore Greece

-A Euro tour: Rome, Paris, London

-Bungee jump!

-Publish an article in a major newspaper (Done with this, but perhaps, with a more decent article.

-Read 1001 (and more) books

-Produce an indie movie

Quite ambitious stuff, don’t you think? Or should I say crazy? Haha. Anyway, that’s just about 10% of the list. With some things I’m still not sure if it should be added to the list… Of course, the list’s not complete yet. I’m giving myself until I’m 25, perhaps,… that’s about  five years from now, to give room to the stuff that I might want to do but haven’t thought about yet at the moment. I can’t remember if my best buddy and I talked about doing the things on the list together or what, but definitely we’ll be doing some together. She has been taking Italian classes (and I think with the number of units she has it could be considered her minor) and thinking of pursuing a higher degree in Rome… so the Euro tour was originally her idea. I know we have so much time down the line to spend together, and I’m sure about that.

You should try making a list, too. It could be frustrating if you started to think and then you find out that you really don’t know what you want in life… but then, the moment you think of  one genuine thing that you wanted on your list, it feels so good. And then you’ll realize, this is crazy but I should do this!

Today’s Bits of Hell

I went to the bookstore this afternoon. I was asked to buy pens. Yeah, writing supplies. And I do have a list, like a grocery list. I think maldita kid gives away her pens, though she always says somebody borrowed it and she forgot to get it after class. Fortunately, she’s not using gtech yet.

Anyway, I hated going to the bookstore. I’m always tempted to buy books. I want this, I want that… Temptation. I can’t help but browse through the shelves. I saw the Vintage Twins collection, and I wanted all of them. I bought Dante’s Inferno, one part of the Vintage Sin Twin. It’s paired with Roth’s Sabbath’s Theater and I’d buy that next time. Then I’d buy Vintage Lies: Henry James’ What Maisie Knew and McEwan’s Atonement. And the next Vintage Twin, until I have all ten. These are limited edition prints, and I want these all on my shelf. Yeah.

Speaking of books, I read that a Swedish writer tried to publish a sequel to J.D. Salinger’s Catcher in the Rye. Coming Through the Rye, a spinoff advertised as a sequel to Salinger’s bestseller, allegedly chronicles Holden Caulfield’s life 60 years after. However, publication of the said book in the US was blocked by the court. It was a good thing… Catcher in the Rye is my all-time favorite, Holden Caulfield is a memorable character and of course people would like to remember him as the cynical teen whose thoughts seem to mirror our own at one point in our lives.

Argh.

I’m tired. My scoliosis is acting up again. I have philo class tomorrow and it’s until 20.30. Hell, I’m crashing.

A Matter of Crap Ingenuity

I’ve got a short story due in a month.

And that’s not all. (Lol. Sounds like home shopping network)

I also need two poems and an essay ready by next month.

The essay would be easy to do, the poem just fine, but the short story… It’s another story. I have to admit I’m a bad fiction writer. Honestly I know I can’t write fiction. Really. During my junior year in hs, I almost flunked English because my short story was a total crap. It was sort of a horror story with crazy characters and there’s really nothing worthy about it. I’m lucky the teacher still gave me a passing grade, knowing that I can write really well, just don’t make me do fiction.

Another thing I’m worrying about this writing assignment is whether I would write in English or Filipino. I can write better in English. But to do so would be quite ironic. At one point, this course is about celebrating the Filipino ingenuity in Rizal, and though we are free to write in a language we are most comfortable at, I think it would be better to do it in Filipino. Problem is, I’m having a hard time writing in straight Filipino. And doing a Filipino paper using MS Word sucks.

Anyway, I think I’ll be spending much of my free time far from home for the next few weeks. There’s the tension again, I can sense it, and I know I have to run for cover before it builds up big time. Eventually it will cause nonsense fights and I don’t want to get into pointless ideological battles with pap again. I guess, it will be coffee shop afternoons again.

Home Economics

I’m not, by any way, a spoiled kid. It’s just that I’m not into doing house chores. 

So my kaboom super powers were put to the test. Today’s lesson is on home economics. 

9am. Too early. I woke up because everybody’s acting like crazy ants. Chaos! All were too busy moving around as if something’s looming over a deadline. And while they were moving about, they were barking errands to me. Hell. By noon, they were all out, gone, and I was left sitting in front of the TV. Dazed. It took me sometime before realizing that I’m today’s housekeeper. Panic!

Worst case scenario: Pan on fire. Panic!

As if they’re not cruel enough, they left the rice cooker half-empty. Tutong. Dunno how to cook this rice variant right, so the one option left is to do sinangag with the cold leftover in the fridge. Only, I’m afraid of the freakin’ stove. Lucky enough there’s ready-to-eat lechon kawali on the table.

Time to do the chores. Wash the dishes. Quite allergic to dishwashing liquid. Then, take the washed clothes to dry. Mom’s note: Arrange by color. Yeah. Like the color spectrum. Next. Sweep, dust over,… enough. I’m tired. Phew. I’m no superwoman.

While most people would consider that H.E.’s the easiest subject in school because it’s just about practical everyday routine, I have to say I totally disagree. I think language is the easiest. Everybody talks, just think how people love to gossip. Admit it. Lol.

That’s it for today, folks. Today’s lesson: home economics. I guess I did fairly… Quite a good job for someone so lazy…

Rollback.

The thing is… it happened in a flash. Just a few months ago, Aby and I talked about moving into a condo in Diliman with friends when I get back to UP. We’ve been planning to move into a flat since first year, with Nekko and other peeps, but we never got down to actually paying for the down payment. This time I’m quite sure we’re finally moving… until my admission notice from UP Manila came last week of May. Poof! Rollback the plans. I guess I’m still staying with the family for the next four or five years.

The last week was a whirlwind of events. I’ve been doing the paper works since Monday. I felt really tired, until I realized this was my easiest enrollment in four years! No long and winding lines. No early lunch break. No long walks around the campus. And for the first time, I didn’t beg for a slot in a class. Thank the cosmic stardusts for that!

I kept telling myself this is what I really wanted because I can’t help but think of the things I’d be missing in Diliman. We’re a tight bunch, we do the complicated enrollment journey together even when we’re from different colleges. We enlist on the same subjects; arrange our schedules so we can do lunch together.

Back with the dudes... Dinner at Aveneto

 I went back to Diliman last Tuesday to get some papers, and I went out with them again for the first time in six months and perhaps, for the last time, in a couple of months. We had dinner at our fave resto, then spent the rest of the night at Starbucks like we used to do. It was a cold evening and I didn’t mind the time… the gossips kept flowing and we can’t resist the engaging talk. I came home exhausted just an hour after midnight; pap was in the living room ready to scorn me for getting way past the 12am curfew. I didn’t care. I’m quite happy. I loved that night. Except for one thing. It hit me hard, right through. But I’m glad I’m finally over it.

Coffee... and gossip. Lethal!

 

 

 

I think it would be better this way. We need to grow as individuals. I know we’ve got to get out of comfort zones once in a while. And this could be the perfect time for me. When you care for people, all you could wish is for them to be okay. Though I guess things would never get back to the way they used to be, I’m glad things changed for us. I couldn’t be more happy seeing someone I care for really happy, at last.

Out of the box or whatever… there’s nothing more.